Sunday, October 28, 2012

I #Poko You

Dear Readalot,

I love you. Kinna. Maybe. Ugh!! I don't know. Let me think about it.

*870 AD*
WOMAN: My lord, I shall do all I can to support, respect and stand by you.
MAN: My lady, I loveth thou
WOMAN: I'm  glad that thou dost. I loveth thou also.
MAN: Will thou be-eth my wifeth?
WOMAN: It would be my pleasure, my Lord

MAN: You are as beautiful as an angel. I could gaze at your lovely face for eternity.
WOMAN: Oh Johnny. You are so sweet. I love you.
MAN: *kisses her hand* And I, you. Marry me, my angel.
WOMAN: Of course darling.

MAN: You're one sexy lil' mama. Whoa!
WOMAN: (giggles) thank you.
MAN: I do love you though.
MAN: Err...You're pretty.
WOMAN: (giggles) okay. Me too.
MAN: I want you to marry me.
WOMAN: (giggles) okay.

MAN: Girl, you're hot.
WOMAN: I know.
MAN: Take your cloths off.
MAN: But I love you.
WOMAN: Okay. *takes cloths off*
MAN: Marry me?
WOMAN: In your dreams.

Over the years many things have changed. Even love. Maybe especially love. Love at first was seen as duty. People loved because it was the right thing to do. Then, people loved because it made them feel good. Then, people loved because it was fun. It gave them something to do. Now people love because it gets them what they want. Sometimes. Tell a man you love him and he'll give you whatever you want as long as he can afford it. If you ask for it with all your sex appeal turned up, he'll steal it if he can't afford it. You want your parents to do something for you, go - "Daddy, I love u" and you're most likely going to get it. However, this doesn't work on all parents. At least, not on my mum.

When I was a kid, every night before I go to sleep, I would kiss my mum and say - "Mummy I love u". It was one of my most favorite things to do. Now, if I hug her too long, she'll say - "What do u want?" "Am I owing u?" "Move move, I don't want people to know that I know you." However, I can't blame her for this. Love has been abused to the point that, 'I love you', might mean, "I want something from you." People assume they can get others to do whatever they want as long as they use the 'L' word. You should try it out on an armed-robber. Robber screams, "Your money or your life?" And you go - "I love you." Then come back here and leave a comment about how it goes. If a robber doesn't come to your house, go find one.

Once upon a time, our ancestors lived their whole lives telling only one chic "I love u". Kunta Kinte was probably sold because he refused to tell a white woman he loved her. He had a babe. He was faithful. He got sold for love. That was when love was love. Now you find one guy with ten girlfriends and luckily for all of them, he loves them all. The only disadvantage is they don't know they're sharing their man. If you ask the guy, he would probably say - "That would make it complicated and there would be a lot of disharmony and as a gentle guy, I don't like disharmony.

The other day, my brother, Wozealot, and I were having this weird conversation and he said everybody has their own definition of love. He asked me - "What's the difference between a man with one wife and plenty mistresses and a man with many wives? What if he loves all of them?" That's one of the numerous examples that people are not well again. (My brother's crazy. Think I'm lying? Check here --->

Now love has been misused so much so, I think its about time we found a different word. I been thinking about it a lot and I think I've come up with the perfect replacement. The Rick Ross grunt. If you see a girl you truly truly love, you should go - "I *rickrossgrunt* you." We use that until it expires and we can move on to something else. Maybe #poko. "I #poko u*" ... Yea? No? Ok.


And Readalot, I've thought about it. I love you...

Yours truly, Rantalot


  1. likey. #Poko works for me and your brother is definately crazy!

  2. hahaha love this

    strangely though your mother never asks me what I want when I hug matter how long

    Everything evolves with the as well

    - Wozealot

    1. Maybe I was adopted after all. Lol

  3. Finally got to know who's Wozealot! Well me i *RickRossGrunt* you, please #Poko me back Baby.

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