SHE :- Gooooaaaaal!!!!!!
HE :- Honey, the ball is at the back of the net.
SHE :- Oh. I really thought Messi would have scored that
one.
HE :- Sweetie, that was Rooney.
SHE :- But you told me yesterday that it was Messi.
HE :- Babe, that was another team and game.
SHE :- Oh, ok. So Rooney and Messi are teammates?
HE :- *sigh*
If you see ten naija men, eight will probably be diehard
football fans. Naija men love their football. Sorry, let me rephrase that.
Naija men are crazy about football. For my ‘Hamrican’ readers, we’re talking
about soccer. I’ve seen many of them cry, laugh, make friends, make enemies,
get drunk and even get beaten up for that game. That game that FIFA is yet to
pay them for. That game!!!
Ladies, for years now, have complained and whined about this
insane addiction that their men have. “You love this stupid game more than you
love me.” She would cry.
Wanting to surprise her husband, she would cook his
favourite dish and wear that red sexy panty-hose thing. “I’m gonna make him
feel alright.” She would say happily as she lights candles all over the house. She
plans to surprise her husband with the perfect romantic night.
At about 8:45pm, her husband is banging on the house door. “Chineye…Chineeeeeeyeee
open this door na.” She rushes to the door excited and opens it as she strikes
a to-die-for Madonna pose. Oga ignores the pose, hurries inside the house and grabs
the remote. “What are you doing?” Chineye asks. “You didn’t see me standing
here shey? You didn’t notice the candles?”…Dan glances at her briefly. “Oh
that? I thought you were doing yoga or something. Plus the game started fifteen
minutes ago.” He looks back at the TV…the game.
Having competed with football for years and lost…EVERYTIME,
women have now learned to live the “If you can’t beat them, join them”
lifestyle. This is why we have so many Chealsea, Manchester United, Arsenal and
Barcelona fans
that don’t know jack about their so-called teams. They buy original jerseys and
stamp their names on the back of them so their ‘baby’ can be proud.
If a babe is in the middle of guys having a conversation about football, she tries to contribute so she doesn't seem clueless, even if in the end, she seems even more clueless than they first thought.
Some babes change teams as soon as they change 'babies', so they forget what team they’re supporting sometimes. One week they post - “Chelsea for life. Up Blues” and the next, “Barca forever. Merciless Messi”.
Some babes change teams as soon as they change 'babies', so they forget what team they’re supporting sometimes. One week they post - “Chelsea for life. Up Blues” and the next, “Barca forever. Merciless Messi”.
Guys when you see your lady making the effort, you sef
encourage her. It’s not easy to pretend that you care about C. Ronaldo….He does
have nice abs though. (-_-)
Yours truly, Rantalot
P.S: Happy birthday to my amazing mama :)